weather & drama / tofu ricotta lasagna

You know how people always tell you that they "don't like drama"? They're lying. Everyone likes drama...it gives them something to talk about, worry about, obsess over, cry over and laugh about. Sure, we've got reality shows, but the funny thing is, it's usually the news and the weather channel that are the most entertaining...

The weatherperson stands before a neon map of the United States with a clicker and a bug-eyed expression of terror. "It's going to be a wet one out there today folks," he says while waving his hand over a green smudge in Connecticut, "expect flooding in some parts and power outages from the wind gusts". This is when you start to get excited and check to make sure that your flashlights have fresh batteries in them. "Gusts could be over 40 miles per hour". You lock all of the windows and check your pantry. Six cans of beans, some mustard, pasta sauce, brown rice, and a hundred other items. You realize that if this turns into as big of a storm as they're predicting, there's no way you'll be able to survive. You must go to the store and buy water (this is one of those strange human responses to any type of weather from a light rain to a full blown you-need-to-evacuate hurricane). "And the traffic is going to be a doozy too". Maybe you shouldn't go on the highway then? Although if it's windy, a tree might fall down, in which case the backroads would be more dangerous than traffic on the highway. Hmm...you'll have to wait and see. 

Several hours and three raindrops later, you go outside and look at the blue sky with disappointment. "Where's the storm?" you wonder. You were so excited to wear your new Hunter rain boots and North Face shell, but since you already called in from work, you throw your PJ's back on and put on the news. "Steve Jobs didn't have to die!" says the newsperson dramatically, with the same voice as the guy who does movie previews. Really? Was he murdered, given the wrong medication, or secretly still living on some tiny island in the caribbean? "He started his cancer treatment too late". Seriously? This is a news story? You pretend to want to turn off the news, but another headline catches your eye. It's about a missing baby (I swear they have one every week, and doesn't it always seems like the parents end up being guilty?). You see an adorable picture of the baby and start feeling emotional, but the next thing you know the newsperson is on to the next pressing headline: "What happened to Lindsay Lohan's teeth?" they announce. "Sources say that smoking cigarettes are to blame." Wow, I had no idea that cigarettes made your teeth yellow...what an astonishing breakthrough! After watching for 10 more minutes and learning about the recent shootings, you feel like the world is going to end and check the bolt lock on your front door. Solution? Put on Pride & Prejudice, snuggle with your pets on the couch, and allow yourself to get lost in Mr. Darcy's eyes...

And since you're staying in and watching a movie, why not whip up some lasagna for those unicorn friends that are stopping by later with a tazer gun and pepper spray? 

Growing up, lasagna was always my favorite dish. I remember one day at school, the teacher asked us to write down our favorite food. Most kids put down chocolate, cookies, hot dogs, or hamburgers, but not me...nope, I was the weirdo who put down lasagna (but it was spelled more like: lazanya). Hey, I was in third grade...give me a break.

Lasagna with Tofu Ricotta

1 package whole wheat lasagna noodles (I use Bionaturae)

1 large jar of Rao's marinara sauce, or marinara sauce of your choice

1 T extra virgin olive oil
1 large yellow onion, diced

3 garlic cloves, diced

1 package button mushrooms, diced

1-2 heads broccoli, finely chopped

salt & pepper to taste

*for tofu ricotta:

2 packages extra firm tofu (I use The Bridge) crumbled
4 T italian seasoning blend or Penzey's Sandwich Sprinkle (not sure why they call it this...weird)
1/4 cup + more nutritional yeast (in the bulk section of WF)
2 T + stock (I use Imagine No-Chicken stock)
2 T lemon juice
salt & pepper to taste

*a note about making the tofu ricotta...I've never really measured out these ingredients before, so I'm estimating for you, but taste as you go and see. It should taste salty, cheesy & herbalicious. If not, adjust accordingly.*

Preheat oven to 350. In a large pot, cook pasta noodles according to package directions. Drain noodles and rinse with cold water, then set aside in a bowl of cool water. In a saute pan, saute onions in olive oil until soft, then add garlic, mushrooms, broccoli and some salt. Cook until soft, just a few minutes. Take off stove and let cool. In a mixing bowl, combine crumbled tofu, seasoning, nutritional yeast, stock (use as much as you need to make a ricotta cheese consistency), and lemon juice. Take out a 9 x 12 baking dish (I use a cast iron or ceramic baking dish), and pour a thin layer of pasta sauce over the bottom of the pan. Now add one layer of cooked noodles, side by side over the sauce. Add half of the veggie mixture and half of the ricotta mixture and pat down lightly and evening over the noodles. Cover with a generous amount of pasta sauce, then repeat the process one more time. Top with a third layer of noodles, and pour the rest of your pasta sauce over top. Sprinkle with nutritional yeast for a cheesy top. Place in the oven and bake for 40 minutes. Remove from oven and allow to cool, then top with almesan sprinkles and pesto and serve to 6 nervous unicorns. 

Optional topping: Walnut pesto

1 cup loosely packed basil, washed and pulled off stems

1/2 cup raw walnuts, toasted (in oven at 350 for 10 minutes or until fragrant)

1 T fresh lemon juice

1 tsp miso (I use South River brown rice miso)

2 T extra virgin olive oil 

sea salt & pepper to taste 

process ingredients in food processor until just a little chunky...adjust seasonings to preference.

Optional topping: Almesan sprinkles (tastes better than parmesan!)

1/2 cup almonds, toasted (see above toasting procedure for walnuts)

1 tsp + lemon zest

sea salt to taste

process ingredients in food processor until crumbly and reminiscent of parmesan cheese...adjust seasoning to preference.